She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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