To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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