Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
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