Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
im calling her cock vulture from now on
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Alive.
So much puke
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Randomize
