Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
okay pat passed out under dana's car
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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