My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
