plz talk dirty to me
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
