how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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