I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
