please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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