hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
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