I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
