Is it because I queefed?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Randomize
