Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
