she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
