I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
