Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize