I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
