the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
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