Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
