I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
