If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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