we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Randomize