Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
