tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
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