office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
You left your phone here
Wait...
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
