oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize