just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
two words...techno handjob
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
