I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
