i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
