I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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