i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
