Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
