thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
