she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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