I want to have your abortion
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Randomize
