She announced her abortion via fbk
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
