I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
MIDGETS
????
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
