we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize