I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
