You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
