why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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