I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
