she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Randomize