I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
