she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
