the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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