You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
