nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I just googled if crying burns calories
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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