That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
