"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
