I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
